The Naked Man in the Bedroom and Other Mistakes Sellers Make

Realtors are well aware that sometimes things go awry.  We are, after all, taking customers though someone else’s home, often at a moment’s notice.  If a Realtor comes to a closed bedroom door in a supposedly empty house, our inclination is to proceed with caution.       

“Hello?” We announce loudly. “I’m the Realtor, showing the house.”

         When you hear no response, you take a breath and turn the knob. 

 Usually, no one’s there.

         Occasionally, however, the door will be yanked open by a sleepy, very naked young man and you blurt out whatever comes into your head first– which in my colleague’s case was, “Get some clothes on!”

Just What Exactly Are You Selling Here?

            If your house is on the market, here are a couple of helpful hints to prevent your potential buyer from completely forgetting what your house looks like in the wake of a showing disaster.

1.  Make sure ALL family members know the house is being shown.

A naked guy is not the only thing that can keep a buyer from being interested in your house.  Suppose your teenager doesn’t know the house is being shown at 4 and he gets home at 3:00.  I don’t know about your kids, but mine could have cooked a 4 course meal, eaten it in front of the TV, left the dirty dishes on the coffee table and invited half their friends over for a video game marathon. 

When you’re selling your house, you only get one chance to make a first impression.  Make sure it’s the impression you want to make.

It’s Me or the Dog

2. Pets are great, but your buyer doesn’t want them.

            I really love dogs. But you know how your children don’t always behave the way you expect when you’re not there?  You should see how your dog acts.  Sometimes he barks and growls through the entire showing, following your potential buyers menacingly from room to room.  Dogs are territorial, after all, and we are invading his territory.

 If your dog is a barker (or worse, a growler), it’s a good idea to take him with you during a showing.  You do not want the buyer to be distracted from how great your home is by anything that is not going to stay with the house. 

            And since this is an equal opportunity blog, make sure there’s nothing about your cats, birds, pet tarantula or Harry-the-Gila-monster that might put off a potential buyer.  Remember, they are buying your house.  Not your lifestyle. 

Honey, Do We Know These People?

3. You want your buyers to be focused on the house. Period.

 If you’ve watched much HGTV, you know that one of the most common recommendations made to sellers is to remove personal pictures.  I’m not sure I buy into that completely, but I will tell you that in the twenty years I’ve been in real estate, I’ve had numerous people get distracted by whether they knew the people in the photos on the wall.

             Take those pictures of your family as they grew and pack them away.  It’ll be one less thing you’ll have to pack when the sold sign goes in your yard.

Calling American Pickers…

4. Go Ahead and Start Packing.

This may sound silly, but sometimes people can’t look past your stuff to see the house.  If you have a collection of china elephants or plastic tigers or popcorn that resembles famous people, please, pack it away.  You don’t want that popcorn kernel that looks “just like Elvis” to be the only thing your potential buyer remembers about your house.

          Distractions can prevent a buyer from considering the house as a possibility for them.

All the World’s a Stage

5.  De-Clutter!

            Everyone’s heard of “staging, but what on earth is it?  Simply put, it’s displaying your home at its best.  Picture the display on the end of the shelf at your local big-box store.  Then compare it with the window display at a high end department store.

             You don’t want your house to look like a Sam’s Club. 

   You want Macy’s in New York at Christmas. 

           

            Let’s face it.  We all have too much stuff.  To sell your home, you need the space to look clean, bright and spacious. If that means some furniture and knickknacks go into storage for a while, so be it.

Maybe We Should Go……

           

6.  Don’t stay.

           

Your presence at a showing prevents a potential buyer from taking their time.  They won’t look in closets, express their opinion or discuss the house with each other.  Many sellers think they can stay and answer questions, but truthfully, if the seller is there, there likely won’t be any questions.  Buyers feel uncomfortable and the showing is hurried.   

And you hired a professional to sell your house.  Let him.  He’s the expert. 

        So, when your Realtor calls to tell you she’s showing your house, leave.   

        And don’t forget to take the naked guy with you.